Elizzlebizzle

i've just been using my new blog lately.  I apply to lots of jobs.  I cook sometimes.  I cook brownies that always turn out to be cake.


I have two interviews for jobs.  I want the perfect job- but I'm totally aware of the fact that I would take almost any job ever at this point that had to do with recycling or trash.  being home is making me

1. fat
2. lazy
3. really in tune with daytime TV
4. useless
5. feel like damaged goods
6. bored
7. crazy
8. desperate
9. self conscious
10. paranoid

I've started an exercise regime using the sparkpeople videos that are on youtube.  I think it's good.  It's way too hot to do anything involving exertion outside.

new post in trashlady blog.  Progress with the job search.  I could be a trash/recycle intern in Ecuador if I want.  I've heard back from a fellowship in NYC that also is in India and London and I made it to the second round of applicants (now I have to do even more paperwork to go third round).  AND one of my applications with the city of Arlington VA went from "Application Received" to "Referred" which is their quiet way of saying that I passed the first inspection and they gave my app to the hiring manager.  SO.  Progress.

Mom has been driving me bat shit crazy the past few days.  I am so fucking glad she went on her business trip to Myrtle Beach / Charleston so I have the house to myself.  Sweet lord, why is it so hard to get along with her sometimes?

Ok.

http://trashlady.blogspot.com/

does anyone know how to import blogspot into LJ?  the FAQ says no but I think there must be a way around it.  Is cut and paste really my only option?

(ps I'm not leaving LJ for realz.)

so I'd been reading the best of craigslist for at least an hour when I read this one: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/tus/487665904.html

and cried all over myself. 


in other news I now have a de.l.ici.ou.s account, however it's spelled, and a bloglines account, which is the coolest thing ever.  I guess I can make friends with the internet again and learn about what it's been doing while I was sitting on Facebook for the past four years of college.  What else do I need to join?  Is twitter really something I need to do?

I really want to start a new blog that is on blogspot or something that is real and not livejournal.  but I will always keep livejournal anyway.  I just realized today though that RSS feeds are just livejournal for the UNIVERSE.

also great job search 2008 continues.  I have applied to two more jobs in the past 24 hours and one is being a trash truck dispatcher.

alright I'm ready to blow a gasket right now...

So last week I DID end up going to Cambridge / Boston for the interview with fantasy job 2000.  I stayed with Carmen in Providence and that was really really fun.  I saw her life and met her friends and it was really nice to get away.  The interview went really well, the people were nice and I loved the place.  I fell in love with Cambridge, which I know is partly due to the weather.  Carmen and I had so much fun doing things in Cambridge and Boston and I thought I had the job in the bag.  Who is more qualified to help people sort recyclables than me?  The people acted like they loved me and we got along really well.  They said they'd get back to me in a week or two and the earliest I'd start if I got it was the first or second week in June.  Perfect!

Well, not even 24 hours later I got a call from their human resources, "we were very impressed with you but we have chosen another candidate who has been volunteering with us and already knows the people who come to our recycling center.  They know everything about Cambridge already.  Thanks for coming up, anyway."

?!!!!  why the fuck would you want me to come all the way up there for a second interview if you ALREADY KNEW YOU WERE GOING TO HIRE A FREAKING VOLUNTEER THAT YOU ALREADY KNOW?!! THANKS FOR WASTING A LOT OF MY TIME AND MONEY, YOU JERKS.  Welcome to bomb-elizabeth's-ego day/week/year.

so fuck that shit.  It really wasn't a waste though because I'm really glad I got to go up to Providence and see Carmen and her school- which I never probably would have done if I didn't have a job interview.  And we had a lot of fun.  And I found another job in Cambridge that I want that I already applied to so.  We'll see.  I combed the bowels of the internet yesterday for more jobs and found NONE.  I am graduating in 6 days and I have nothing.  I hate everything.

And the girls I live with are being bitchy- telling secrets behind my back and going out to my favorite restaurant without asking me to go.  Normally this wouldn't bother me but because of period fun time 4000 I am extra sensitive and extra pissed / hopeless on all fronts.  I seriously can't wait to get the fuck out of here right now.  I hate everything.  Why do people have to be like this?  Boys don't do this shit.

UDSJAKFL;DJSKAFL;JDSKAL;GFD  also my final thesis is due tomorrow and I haven't done SHIT to fix it up.  cool.

I made it to interview round II, but they called today to say that they won't consider me unless I GO UP TO FLIPPING CAMBRIDGE THE WEEK AFTER NEXT WEEK.  WHICH I COULD DO FOR ABOUT 24 HOURS BUT IT COSTS $300.  Which I don't really have for this kind of thing. 


AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

also I am so on the edge about failing spanish IV.  If I miss the two more days of class that this interview shit would make me do.... Jesus.

tips for a phone interview?

ps I changed all my user icons.

well.  It's been a little over 2 weeks since Sam died.  I'm just trying to forget about it but at the same time not forget anything.  I'm scared to forget her.  On our birthday my mom and I talked and she said she couldn't wait until she didn't think of Sam every day.  I cried.  This is the first time I've been able to listen to music (of my own choosing) in 2 weeks- and I can't.  I'm writing about Sam now instead of page 30 on my thesis (due monday).

I had a dream last week, exactly one week after she died that I had gone home and I was sad because she wasn't there.  I went out to the backyard  to see where she was buried and she was on top of the ground, alive!  She ran around just like before she went blind and I held her and petted her and ran around too.  In the dream it was like the euthanasia medicine didn't work and she dug herself out of the ground and she was ok.  And mom was upset that she had gotten so sad for nothing and said that we'd just have to put her to sleep again but I didn't understand why.  I was so happy and Sam was so happy too.  I was so happy that she wasn't dead.  I can still feel how her fur felt in the dream.  It was a great dream, I woke up happy.  But now I'm just sad. 

I should just cut the music off and go back to thesis shit hole 6000 and then maybe I'll quit crying.   What the fuck is going on?

HOLY MOLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just found my DREAM JOB (until grad school) and it's in CAMBRIDGE, MASS.  I am super excited.  I sent my resume and cover letter last night and they called THIS MORNING to ask for an interview and to see if I can COME UP THERE TO INTERVIEW but I can't.  Next week is hell week 6 in academic land.


OH BOY.  Someone tell me is Cambridge great?  I am pretty sure it is.  But for a stupey southern girl?  Am I going to die?

I WANT THIS JOB.

Today (April 15) I turned 22.  I had a pretty mediocre birthday due to the ridiculous stress levels I've been having (thesis paper, thesis presentation, failing Spanish IV, finding a job, figuring out my future, graduating...), grief about my poor dead dog (unbearable mostly), and an out of control head cold hell I got over the weekend that is still making life difficult.  I was okay with having a quiet birthday, especially since Sam died.  Everyone was really nice though and I got several cards and hugs and phone calls and facebook messages.

One of my friends and my roommate Rachel told me this afternoon they were going to cook me dinner since I had so much homework to do (writing my thesis) but since I got off of work early I just worked on it early.  So we went out to dinner and that was so nice.  It was nice to just go with two people.  Then we came back and Allison (one of my really good friends who graduated already) came over and we talked.  I love it when she comes over and we can just talk.  Then I called my mom and we talked about our birthday (it's her birthday too) out in the common room of our suite.  We talked about Sam (my dog) a lot and I started crying, and seriously right when I started crying the lights went out and a horde of my friends started singing happy birthday to me with a glowing pink and brown cake!!!!!!!  And I got to blow them out and make a wish and everything.  I still am so touched and happy.  It was so nice.  They even got me champagne that isn't Andre (which is all I usually drink at any given time!)  In terms of culture this little birthday has "American Tradition" written all over it and that makes me glow like a birthday cake inside, for some reason.  My mom got to hear it too and I took a picture of all of my friends with the phone and I got everyone to sing into the phone happy birthday to her and I sent her a text message with the picture and the song and she LOVED IT.  I have never been so happy and satisfied with technology in my life, especially since she had to spend her birthday driving to Myrtle Beach, dealing with her stupid job, and then alone in a hotel room.

So basically when my faith runs out completely and I don't expect anything at all, the friends will pull though, especially Rachel.  I think she understands how sad and sick and stressed I've been.

and on that note, I have not felt this sad and lacking the happy in a long time [read: early high school?]  I am glad this birthday ended on such a great note. 

So I've done the math and life will start to get better in several serious ways beginning on the late afternoon of April 30, after I present my thesis to 800 people in an auditorium.  not really 800 people but pretty much.  Let the games begin!

(also, I haven't written about one of the main most awesome things that happened to me ever: winning the Miss Warren Wilson pageant.  But I won, and maybe I'll mention it again someday, but shit.  Things are not all terrible.  I have to remind myself of that.

today was one of the worst days I've ever had.

My dog is dead and my heart is broken.

Movie Meme... I give you a quote from the movie and you guess which movie it's from!!!!!!!!!!!!  Thanks Sam!!  This is not in order of what I like, obviously... but you should watch all these if you haven't.

1. "Relax, would you? We have seventy dollars and a pair of girls underpants. We're safe as kittens. "

2. "Why are you hiding back there? You don't have to hide from me - I'm Peg Boggs, your local Avon representative and I'm as harmless as cherry pie..."

3. "Too bad, she said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak."

4. "May your humps grow straight and your hooves grow strong."

5. "What the fuck happened to the Delta I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh? "Ooh, we're afraid to go with you Bluto, we might get in trouble." Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this. Wormer, he's a dead man! Marmalard, dead! Niedermeyer..."

6. "I used to be able to name every nut that there was. And it used to drive my mother crazy, because she used to say, "Harlan Pepper, if you don't stop naming nuts," and the joke was that we lived in Pine Nut, and I think that's what put it in my mind at that point. So she would hear me in the other room, and she'd just start yelling. I'd say, "Peanut. Hazelnut. Cashew nut. Macadamia nut."

7. Royal: "I've always been considered an asshole for about as long as I can remember. That's just my style. But I'd really feel blue if I didn't think you were going to forgive me. "
Henry Sherman: "I don't think you're an asshole, Royal. I just think you're kind of a son of a bitch. "
Royal: " Well, I really appreciate that."

8. "Muhammed is the most commonly used name on Earth. Read a fucking book for once."

9. "Esteban was eaten! Check the scanning monitor before it dives too deep!"

10. "1 - he didn't get the photo. 2 - before he could assemble it, a gang of bank robbers took him hostage. The cops gave chase. They got away... but he caused a crash. When he came to, he'd lost his memory. An ex-con picked him up, mistook him for a fugitive, and shipped him to Istanbul. There he met some Afghan raiders who too him to steal some Russian warheads. But their truck hit a mine in Tajikistan. He survived, took to the hills, and became a Mujaheddin."


so reply with the number and what you think the movie is.  No cheating!  That includes google and imdb. 

I'm back at dreaded school.  It's going to be ok.  Reed brought me back Sunday and left to go back home today.  I don't feel like crying as much as I did so it's better.  I seriously was trying not to cry like... 6 times a day at least.  Sucks.  But the girls are being so nice and good to me and I am genuinely happy to be back.  Classes are a bit daunting but they will be ok.  My course load is so compact and nice.  I'm going to get good at spanish.  I'm going to write my stupid thesis.  I'm going to have some fun before this is all over.

I thought of some names for boy hamsters when I figure out my life and can get one. 

1. Shaqille Oneil (and we could call him Shaq or my favorite, Shasqueal)
2. Radio Raheem (from the Spike Lee movie "Do the Right Thing") and we could call him Radio OR Raheem and it would be sweet.

So like every other crisis-seeming time in my life I have a pop anthem to help me get through it.  Isn't that what they're for, anyway?

I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better

You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cause
Everything's going to be alright

I do enjoy being alone at night almost as much as I also love having a special bearded man around- maybe even more sometimes.  I think a lot more and I get a lot more organized.  I also think that I should use this semester to document every second of our lives so that I will have something to remember about how fucking INSANE life is here.  yeah.

probably a lot more updates coming soon. 

To do list for next week

do a ton of service
take canned food to Harvest Hope
get money from Sid and Nancy
take shit to Get Your Gear On
list shit on ebay
go to BB&T
go to credit union
get a temporary membership to a gym
work out at said gym 1x daily
order books for next semester online
finish resume
sell shit at flea market on Saturday

I basically hate everything.

I don't want to go back to school.  I don't want to stay here.  Fuck, I seriously hate everything. 

 updates...
Christmas was pretty good.  My mom copped out and gave me a check which I don't want to accept but I am slowly realizing that my bank account is whithering away.  Being 21 makes it so much easier to blow $10 at a time for some reason.  Not that I drink EVER.  Just saying.

Been puttering around my house mostly with ocasional bouts of consumerism (fueled mostly by slickdeals.net) and friends.  The Reed and Grace machine left to visit family leaving me and Pier to some really nice friend-dates.  I do enjoy those, though I really want to have them with Carmen and Yates before it's too late.

In the past 24 hours I've seen:

Sweeny Todd: AWESOME if you like Tim Burton.  Very bloody.  Very great.  Johnny Depp.  <3

Shortbus: not nearly as great as I expected.  a little... boring.... but ok.  I think it's cool to have real sex in a movie and it not be porn.  porm.

Eyes Wide Shut: also AWESOME and WEIRD AS HELL but worth seeing.  Nicole Kidman sucks.  Tom Cruise is actually ok in this movie only because he's typecasted.  Lots of girl butts and boobs.  Really philosophical?  Hello, Carnival-esque.  Hello, social theory.

My grades were all B's when I expected at least 2 A's.  I'm pissed.  But I suppose I have had a really shitty semester, what with the grandma dying, facing dad, stomach virus, deep midterm school depression, etc.  Ugh.  I FUCKING HATE SCHOOL.

I have a new and exciting future plan.  As of now, I think it would be a fantastic adventure to be a flight attendant after I graduate until I go to grad school.  I need a break and that might be a great adventure.  I know the people will be assholes but... somehow I have hope that it could be a fabulous adventure.  Flying around the world, wearing hilarious outfits... making friends with other flight attendants... TRAVELING and getting PAID A LOT and having HEALTH INSURANCE.

but on the other hand, how the hell am I going to save the world being a flight attendant?  and how the fuck will I be able to sleep at night knowing what my eco-footprint will be with all that jet fuel?!!!!

Why can't I just be Paris Hilton?!!!!! 

oh lawwwd I'm home.  Today I kicked it with my mom.  Made a trek to the mall to return some stuff.  South Carolina is already starting to grate on me.  I'm trying to take it in stride.  Hopefully the after Christmas sales on wool coats will be tremendous since it's pretty warm out.

I bought this thing, the Keeper, last week at Greenlife.  It's an alternative to tampons and basically it's like shoving a small teacup up your cooter.  I've wanted one for a long time because tampons create a lot of waste that goes to the landfill and they are pretty expensive.  Getting used to the keeper is hard, though.  It's cool - I get some kind of cheap thrill from not generating lots of trash.   The non-disposable pads, however, not as cool.  I'm trying.

Yesterday when I woke up my mom asked me if I knew anything about the SNL skit "Dick in a box."  HILARIOUS.  She saw it on the Christmas special rerun that was on recently and LOVES it.  She started singing it and everything.  So later yesterday her old lady friend Helen (82) came over to help us get ready for the party.  Mom asks Helen if she's seen the "Dick in a box" song.  Helen didn't think she had so mom made me find it online to show it to her.  We all watched it together and laughed and Helen said, "Man, that's what I want for Christmas.  All the men can give me anymore is money."  !!!!!!!!!!! so then Mom said "Oh that's so great.  It reminds me of the dessert I make for this party called 'Sex in a Dish.'  And then Helen said "Well you know some people make eclairs shaped exactly like a penis!"

Later that night after the party had started Helen returned and the first thing she said was "Where's the dick in a box?"  and mom said "We don't have that all we have is Sex in a Dish!!"  

Spiderman II was on TV tonight and I liked it.  I wish I had already seen Spiderman I though.  Peter is hotttttt with one thousand t's.

Ugh I want to get sloshed.  The formalities of Christmas annoy me now.